TRUST
A
telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call.
She answered, 'Public Utilities Board.' There was silence. She
repeated, 'PUB.' There was still no answer. When she was going to
cut off the line, she Heard a lady's voice, 'Oh, so this is PUB.
Sorry, I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know
whose number it is.'
Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple
if the telephone operator answered with just 'hello' instead of 'PUB'.
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NO POINTING FINGERS
A man asked his father-in-law, 'Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?'
The father-in-law answered in a smile, 'Never criticize your wife for
her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind
that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a
better husband than you.'
We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are
afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he
would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is
the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one
finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.
If we forgive the others, others will ignore our mistake too.
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CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?
A
person visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and
requested 'I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable
one.' The SDU officer said, 'Your requirements, please.' 'Oh, good
looking, polite, humorous , sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and
dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my
leisure hour, if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I
need companion for conversation and be silent when I want to rest.' The
officer listened carefully and replied, 'I understand you need
television.'
There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a
blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the
faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of
the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and
dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the
excitement of love wears off, they wake up a nd discover that marriage
is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins.
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NO OVERPOWERING
Many relationships fail because one party tries to
overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think
that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits
after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese
saying which carries the meaning that 'It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character.'
It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectation
on changing the spouse character will cause disappointment and
unpleasantness.
It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations. .
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RIGHT SPEECH
There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that 'A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation.'
Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is
too close with each other, we always forget mutual respect and
courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would hurt the
other party.
A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction
site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, 'Hi, Emily!
Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school.' On the way home,
her millionaire husband teased her, 'Luckily you married me. Otherwise
you will be the wife of a construction worker.' She answered,'You
should appreciate that you married me. Other wise, he will be the
millionaire and not you.'
Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship. It's like a broken egg - cannot be reversed.
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PERSONAL PERCEPTION
Different
people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's
poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home, a
boy commented, 'Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the donkey?
'Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey. He
walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, 'The
husband is the head of family. How can the wife ride on the donkey
while the husband is on foot?' Hearing this, the wife quickly got down
and let the husband ride on the donkey.
Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, 'How
can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no
gentleman.'
The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on
the donkey. Then, they met a young man. He commented, 'Poor donkey, how
can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you.'
Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the
donkey and carried it on their shoulders.
It seems to be the only choice left. Later, on a nar row bridge,
the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and
fell into the river. You can never
have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you. Never in the
past, not at present, and never will be in the future.
Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear..
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BE PATIENT
This
is a true story which happened in the States. A man came out of his
home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son
was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man
ran to his son, knocked him away, hammered the little boy's hands into
pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to
the hospital.
Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he
finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the
boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he
innocently said, 'Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck.' Then he asked,
'but when are my fingers going to grow back?' The father went home
& committed suicide.
Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or
u wish to take revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with
someone u love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt
feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference
between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is
greater than revenge.
People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.
'Good Life starts only when you stop wanting a better One'
'Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away '
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